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The Sketchbook Journal: Horror Movie Day

This weekend friends and I saw the Australian zombie movie Undead as part of the Toronto International Film Festival and then went to see Cabin Fever:

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Top 10 Signs Your Apostle is Cheating on You

In regards to yesterday’s post, some new evidence has come to light suggesting that this book has the most depressing cover of the year, and not MTV’s Wuthering Heights.

P.S. Spiritual Facials?  I bet there’s already a Usenet group in the works…

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Begrudging Books By Their Covers

Just this weekend I was complaining to friends while walking through the biography section at Indigo’s that Frida Kahlo’s biography featured a picture of Salma Hayek on the cover.

It’s bad enough that novels need their corresponding movie posters as cover art in order to sell copies, but this, I thought was going too far—the story of someone’s life showcased with a photograph of a completely different person, a movie star.

But that’s not even half as bad as this: The Literary Saloon has pointed out what is probably the most depressing cover of the year. I don’t know if this was MTV’s idea or the publisher’s, but either way it’s sickening.  Sickening in a humourous civilization-in-decline sort of way, of course.

(via Antipixel.)

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The Wcaky Wlord of Wdors

A friend just forwarded this to me:

“Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.”

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Not a Good Day to Be Named John

John Ritter died last night from aortic dissection after collapsing on the set of his series 8 Simple Rules for Dating My Teenage Daughter.

Johnny Cash died last night from his long-suffering diabetes complications.

To these great Johns I tip my black cowboy hat and tumble over a sofa.

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The Lunch I Was Never Meant to Have

Yesterday for lunch I was craving the Pollo Basilico pizza from Amato’s.  For the uninformed, that is pizza with chicken, pesto, and mushrooms.  It is delicious.

However, upon arriving at Amato’s I saw that there was no more Pollo Basilico left!  So I took a quick walk to HMV, bought the new My Morning Jacket CD, and returned to Amato’s shortly after in the hopes that fresh new Pollo Basillico pizza pie would be waiting for me.

I was right, but it must’ve been a popular choice because there were only 2 slices left!  “That was close,” I thought to myself as I got in line. 

Turns out it was a little too close, because of the two people in line ahead of me, the first person chooses, from the selection of various types of pizza numbering nearly two dozen, Pollo Basilico! 

Oh no!

And then, as only my fate would ever have it, the second person in line also chooses Pollo Basilico, taking the last available slice!

Now I am fuming.  I am enraged.  It is rare that I know exactly where I want to eat for lunch, let alone the exact menu item.  And these two thieving chuckleheads stole the lunchtime satisfaction right from under me! So I grudgingly order the Pollo Loco, a sad second-rate replacement involving chicken, red onions, and broccoli.

So today I thought I’d conquer the Amato Problem.  I’d go back, order the Pollo Basilico and all would be right with the world.

I get in line, and see that there is one lonely slice of Pollo Basilico left.  What luck!  I can taste it already!

But what happens?  Of the 20-some different types of pizza available, the ONE SINGLE guy in line ahead of me orders the final slice of the GODDAMNED POLLO BASILICO!

KHAAAAANNN!!!!!!!

I think God doesn’t want me to have this pizza.  It must be a sign.  Tell me, Lord, what should I do?  Point me towards the proper pizza path....

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Monster Fish! and Other Specimens

A few weeks ago I came upon a great little find at Annex Books.  Hidden in the art and design books was a little black hardcover book with a gold-foil stamping of a printing press on the cover.

It was a specimen book of printing types and ornaments from a printing office in Montreal (Lovell & Gibson, St. Nicholas Street) dating back to 1846.

There are some beautiful samples in the book.  Here’s a peek:

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Return of the Penguin

Eight years after leaving newspapers behind him, Berke Breathed is back in November with a new comic strip named (and starring) Opus.

I was never an initial fan of Bloom County, even though it was a huge success.  The only reason I was never a fan, however, is because as a kid I didn’t know it existed.  The local newspaper didn’t carry it, the local library didn’t have any books (and I checked out every cartoon-related book they had), and the only real reference to Bloom County I was ever aware of was the odd Bill the Cat t-shirt that I thought was maybe just a really ill Garfield.

But I’ve since grown to love and appreciate Bloom County, and I look forward to seeing Breathed’s voice in the papers again, even if it is only on Sundays.  I’ll wager the political climate of the U.S. of A these days has something to do with Opus’s return.

Reading news like this makes me not only miss the comic strips that are long gone like Calvin & Hobbes and The Far Side, but it also shows how a cartoonist can properly bow out when he’s finished but then still take up the pen again only when he thinks he has more to say.  It should be a lesson to the creators of the worn-out antics of Garfield, Cathy, and Marmaduke.  Give it a rest, guys (and gals).  Cap that ink and put those pens away.  Your time has come.  There are too many new up-and-comers and struggling comic artists that could be the next best thing to let that fat monday-hating lasagna monster keep taking up valuable newspaper real estate.

Luckily for us, Berke Breathed knows how to pace himself, and will only be in the Sunday pages, leaving plenty of room from Monday to Saturday for the “new classics” like Mutts, Zits, and Get Fuzzy.

No news on the return of Bill the Cat, though.  “ACK!”

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Much Ado About Muppets

I thought I’d compile a bunch of links in honour of of those wacky weirdos and whatsits—The Muppets!  Have fun reacquainting yourself with all those pigs, frogs and chickens!

The Jim Henson Company
The official website of Kermit’s foam empire.

Muppets.com
A less corporate Henson website than the first link.

Jim Henson’s Creature Shop
I never quite knew what the Creature shop logo was… it’s probably a mask, but it looks like an ookpik-type owl.

Muppet Central
This site seems to offer anything you could possibly want to know about the world of the Muppets.  Very comprehensive.

Palisades Toys
These guys make the coolest toys I’ve ever seen.  The toys are gorgeous—they’re sculpted to even look like foam, felt and feather!

Backstage Left
A nice little deposit of rare images, movies, and MP3s.

Muppet Songs
Lyrics to all those nutty songs like Mahna Mahna (and my personal favourite, Captain Vegetable).

Mostly Muppet
This appears to be an entire blog devoted to the muppets!  Heck, what do you need me for?

Can’t get enough?  More links here.

I like to think I have a healthy interest in these multicoloured puppets for a 20-something heterosexual male.  And if ever I doubt myself, I can always be glad I’m not this guy.

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Bazooka Joe and His Gang

Relive the adventures from the safety of your own home!

(Did we ever learn how Bazooka Joe lost an eye?  Was it with an actual bazooka? And what was Mort hiding behind that turtleneck?)

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Not Everybody Loves Raymond

Why is it whenever I turn on the TV I only ever see the same thing?  Everybody Loves Raymond has taken over the airwaves.  It doesn’t matter what day it is or what time, one thing that I can always count on is Ray Romano’s big goofy mug on my TV screen.

I don’t mind reruns.  I love reruns.  But whatever happened to Roseanne, or The Cosby Show, or Charles in Charge?  Okay, maybe not that last one, but I’m confident that better shows than Raymond exist.  They must; I’ve seen them.

New episodes are still being made, so why should I have to suffer twice as much by also being subjected to “classic” episodes?  It’s not like episodes are as memorable as those of Seinfeld or I Love Lucy.  No one ever says, “Hey, remember that episode of Raymond with the Soup Nazi?” or “Remeber that time that Raymond’s brother sang Babaloo?”

Not everybody loves Raymond.  Some of us despise Raymond.

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Language for a Forked Tongue

Satirist Ambrose Bierce published what became The Devil’s Dictionary in weekly newspaper installments from 1881 to 1906.  As dated as it is, it’s still one of my favourite “reference” books, and many of its entries can still make me laugh.  It is brilliantly wicked and cynical.

And because it’s so old it’s in the public domain, and I’ve just found that there are numerous versions of the book floating around online.

Some of my favourite entries:

LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder. This disease, like caries and many other ailments, is prevalent only among civilized races living under artificial conditions; barbarous nations breathing pure air and eating simple food enjoy immunity from its ravages. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than to the patient.

TELESCOPE, n. A device having a relation to the eye similar to that of the telephone to the ear, enabling distant objects to plague us with a multitude of needless details. Luckily it is unprovided with a bell summoning us to the sacrifice.

NOVEMBER, n. The eleventh twelfth of a weariness.

CAT, n. A soft, indestructible automaton provided by nature to be kicked when things go wrong in the domestic circle.

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Pip and Norton toys!

If anyone’s short on ideas for birthday gifts for me, you might want to consider the new Pip and Norton figures from Critterbox Toys.  Check out that spiffy box!

Pip and Norton are two characters created by Ottawa cartoonist Dave Cooper, who is one of my absolute favourites.  Check out his work if you’re unfamiliar—imagine taking your favourite saturday morning cartoons and mixing in a little lustful sexual deviation… you’ve got Dave Cooper!

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Blip! Bloop! Bleep!

I’ve just found how I want to decorate my next apartment: blik it!

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The Lowdown on the dnL

I’ll archive this post with design simply because of the quirky logo.  Even though the concept of this beverage is entirely bizarre, it is nonetheless a clever and playful adaptation of an existing brand.

For the uninformed, 7up has released a new beverage called dnL, and as you can see, dnL is simply the 7up logo upside-down, in what may be the first commerical ambigram.

What kind of mad twisted confectioner has taken over the soda-pop industry?  Is Willy Wonka in charge?  How did a product like this ever get past the marketing department? 

I’m reminded of McDonald’s campaign for the McGriddle, in which even they admit that their new reason-defying product is “weird, but not that weird.”

I haven’t tried it, but I suppose it’s better than the blue antifreeze they’re pawning off as cola over at the Pepsi factory.

As an aside, anyone interested in ambigrams, I strongly recommend you check out the work of John Langdon.

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